Thursday, March 31, 2011

OMG! Do you TXT your kids and hope they do not wonder WTF? Well, go ahead and ROFL by reading a free sample of our eBook of the day: Text Me If You're Breathing You'll LOL


Here's the set-up for Text Me If You're Breathing:

Greg's hilarious take on dealing with the frustrations of parenting in this age of technology made me LOL, ROFL and LMAO (my daughter helped me with those) --Ray Romano, star of "Everybody Loves Raymond"

A great fun read.  I bought this book after seeing Greg's stand-up comedy act in Chicago.  The chapter on The Joy of Sex with 20 Specialists had me laughing until I was crying.--Deborah Correnti

Here's the set-up:

What does a dad do when his daughter asks Santa for a Wii Fit and a 4G iPhone?  The answer is simple:  laugh! 

In Text Me If You're Breathing, stand-up comedian and technically challenged dad Greg Schwem accounts his mishaps and struggles with parenting in today's digital world.  Whether accompanying his daughter to the New York City Apple store, purchasing a "high-tech" swing set, "tweeting" while coaching Little League or trying to lay down cell phone rules, Schwem shows readers that technology, while complicated, can be hilarious.  

Along the way Schwem also aims his barbs at Tiger Woods, the Consumer Electronics Show, in vitro fertilization, the National Spelling Bee and the movie Avatar.  Insightful, heartfelt and always funny, Text Me If You're Breathing is proof that parenting will never come with technical support.

Reviewers Said:

I bought this book after seeing Greg's stand-up comedy in Chicago. If you grew up in the 60's you will love the nostalgic look at how simple things were in our youth.  A great, fun read.

What a delightful book, full of laughs and a sneek peak into the real life of a Comedian. Had to order 12 books to give to friends and family.

What does it take a working mom to finish reading a 212 page book...a vacation! Kudos to Greg for capturing life's perceptions in a book, and giving me a much needed laughter break. BTW - Although just coming back from vacation, it didn't stop me from using my CrackBerry every day, which made the book even funnier to me. I did glance up once in awhile to see the beautiful ocean, cliffs, and surfers in Southern California.

About the Author

Greg Schwem is a corporate stand-up comedian and humorous business speaker. He has performed for companies including Microsoft, Cisco Systems, United Airlines, Motorola, IBM and McDonald's.

 Greg also has appeared in concert with the likes of Celine Dion, Jay Leno and Julio Iglesias. His comedy bits about business and technology can be heard regularly on XM Radio's Laugh USA. 

"Text Me If You're Breathing" is Greg's second book and was written after he struggled trying to master text messaging lingo, iPod transfers, Nintendo Wii and myriad other technologies that his children handle with ease. 

And here, in the comfort of your own browser, is your free sample:


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